Hollywood roundup: Sequels, reboots and spinoffs targeted at Millennials in the works

A roundup of the upcoming movies and TV shows that are going to absolutely demolish Millennials right in the feels

Look, Millennials already have enough to deal with — skyrocketing rent, suspicious knees and the slow realization that “adulting” never actually gets easier. But Hollywood, bless its money-hungry heart, has decided that the best thing to do right now is raid your childhood and teenage memory banks and turn them into content. Again.

And honestly? We’re here for it.

From legendary pop icons to dystopian robots to a mullet-wearing idiot from Louisiana, here’s everything coming down the pipeline that’s going to make you feel 17 again — for better or worse.

“Michael 2” is happening.

Let’s start with the big one.

Lionsgate is moving forward with a sequel to Michael, the Michael Jackson biopic that pulled in roughly $1 billion worldwide — which, by the way, is not a small number. According to Variety, the studio plans to begin filming Michael 2 in late 2026 or early 2027, with a target release window of either the end of 2027 or the first half of 2028.

Details on the sequel’s storyline are still pretty tight-lipped, but considering the first film covered Jackson’s life, legacy and the controversies that followed him, the sequel will have no shortage of material to work with. The original film already had Millennials — who grew up moonwalking in their living rooms and rewinding the “Thriller” video approximately 400 times — completely wrecked in theaters.

Round two is coming. Charge your emotional battery accordingly.

“The Matrix” is back

Buckle up, because Warner Bros. has officially confirmed that a new Matrix film is in development, according to Nerdist.

Now, before you bring up The Matrix Resurrections — we see you, and we respect your hesitation. But the studio is pressing forward, and here’s the part that’s going to get people talking: Keanu Reeves could reprise his role as Neo, if asked.

If asked. As if anyone is not going to ask Keanu Reeves. The man is practically a golden retriever with a black trench coat. Of course they’re going to ask him.

For Millennials who were in middle or high school when the original “Matrix” dropped in 1999 and spent the next several years trying to explain the concept of the simulation to anyone who would listen, this news hits different. Whether this new installment can recapture the cultural lightning-in-a-bottle of the original remains to be seen — but hey, at least it’s something to look forward to while you’re dodging the existential question of whether any of this is even real.

‘Joe Dirt’ gets an animated sequel series

This one might be the most surprising item on the list — or the most inevitable, depending on how you look at it.

According to Deadline Hollywood, a sequel to “Joe Dirt” is in development at Fox, and it’s coming back as an animated series. David Spade will return to voice the lovable, mullet-sporting title character and will serve as an executive producer on the project.

The original “Joe Dirt” came out in 2001, which means this sequel is arriving approximately 25 years later. Twenty-five years. If you saw the original in theaters as a teenager, congratulations — you’re now old enough to watch the animated sequel with your own kids, who will absolutely not understand why it’s funny.

The 2001 film was aggressively stupid in the best possible way, the kind of movie you quoted endlessly in the school hallway and watched on Comedy Central approximately 300 times. An animated series format gives the franchise some real room to stretch out, and with Spade locked in as both the voice and a producer, there’s at least some creative continuity to hang your hat on.

Other nostalgia grenades already in flight

While those three are the headliners, the nostalgia machine is running at full speed across the board right now. “Shrek 5” is officially in the works. “Freaky Friday 2” had Lindsay Lohan and Jamie Lee Curtis coming back together. “Toy Story 5,” a huge hit, has reminded us that time is fleeting and nothing gold can stay. “Clueless” is set to bring Alicia Silverstone back, Steve from “Blues Clues” has upcoming projects and more.

Hollywood has figured out that Millennials, now firmly planted in their 30s and 40s, have both disposable income and a deep, almost embarrassing attachment to the pop culture of their youth. Throw in a sequel here, a reboot there, slap a familiar face on a poster — and suddenly you’ve got a built-in audience that’s going to show up, no matter how many times they swore they were “done falling for this.”

If you’re a Millennial, the next couple of years are going to be a full-on emotional ambush disguised as a release calendar. Michael Jackson, Neo, Joe Dirt — they’re all coming back, and they’re bringing every feeling you thought you outgrew right along with them.

So go ahead and make peace with it now. Stock up on tissues. Maybe text that old friend from high school you watched these movies with.

Hollywood knows exactly what it’s doing. And so do you.