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Even the Pope can’t escape terrible customer service

May 7, 2026, 9:23 AM

If you’ve ever spent forty-five minutes on hold only to have a customer service rep hang up on you, take heart: you’re in good company. Apparently, even the literal Vicar of Christ isn’t immune to the joys of modern banking bureaucracy.

According to The Daily Beast, Pope Leo recently tried to update his address with a Chicago-based bank over the phone. You’d think being the leader of the Catholic Church would grant you a little “VIP” status, but the rep was having none of it.

When the Pope insisted that he couldn’t exactly pop into a branch for a quick update, the rep reportedly demanded he show up in person. The Pontiff—showing a level of patience I personally haven’t possessed since my youngest daughter decided 4 a.m. was “playtime”—asked, “Would it matter to you if I told you I’m Pope Leo?”

The response? Click.

The rep hung up.

Look, I get it. We’ve all been there. You’re three coffees deep, the kids are screaming in the background, and you just want the direct deposit to work. But hanging up on the Pope? That’s a bold strategy, Cotton. Let’s just say I’m glad that customer service rep isn’t the one grading my parenting skills this week.

The bank eventually rectified the situation, but I have a feeling the Pope might be switching to a credit union. Honestly, I’m just relieved to know that whether you’re a busy Denver mom trying to manage the family budget or the Holy Father himself, “your call is very important to us” is still the biggest lie on the planet.

 

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Even the Pope can’t escape terrible customer service